Thursday, August 15, 2013

Our Distorted Version of the Golden Rule


 "So in everything, do to others what you would have have them to do you, this sums up the Law and the Prophets."
  Matthew 7:12 NIV

I would venture to believe that most everyone has heard the Golden Rule, even if they have never cracked open a Bible or stepped foot into a church.  I believe I first learned of the Golden Rule in elementary school.

When I was in school and first introduced to the idea, it was used to prevent us kids from hitting, bullying, stealing, lying, etc.  The idea being, if I didn't want someone to steal my brand new Lisa Frank pencils... (Don't judge me... they were really cool!)... I shouldn't steal their Little Mermaid erasers.   Sounds like a pretty good "rule" to live by, right?

So, what is my big issue with Christianity and the Golden Rule?

I firmly believe many of us have it all wrong.  We are not using the "Golden Rule," but something more along the lines of:

"Don't do to others what you don't want them to do to you."

This may work as a rule for an 8 year old, but is that how Jesus REALLY wanted us to interpret what he said? 

I would argue that there is a HUGE difference in what the Bible actually says, and what we actually do. 

Jesus tells us to DO, our distorted version tells us NOT to do.




I am a big fan of my NIV, but I really like the way this scripture is worded in The Message.  It says,  

“Here is a simple, rule-of-thumb guide for behavior: Ask yourself what you want people to do for you, then grab the initiative and do it for them."

We don't need to go out making huge grand gestures everyday. What if we started out with just little things. Start by thinking about something you would really appreciate, then do it for someone else. I know I really like ice cream. It would make me feel pretty darn special if someone surprised me with an ice cream cone. Maybe a good place for me to start would be to offer some ice cream to someone I think could stand to feel special today.

In closing, I ask that we change our thinking on the Golden Rule. We need to do what Jesus really called us to do.



Dear Lord, I ask that You place people in my path that I might be able to bless today.  I ask that You open my eyes to those people, so I might be able to see them the way that You do. Finally, I ask that You give me the best words, thoughts, and actions, that will help me to reflect Your glory. Amen.






Monday, July 1, 2013

Words: How we hurt those who are suffering...



 Admit it.  You have said these words.  I know I have.

You run into an old friend from high school at the grocery store, and strike up a conversation.  They tell you about a genuine concern they have in their life; they are struggling with divorce, a family member is ill, they don't know if they will have a job next month...

You turn to the one pretty, little statement that you think will shine a little light into their life.   "God doesn't give you more than you can handle."

It is well intended, and absolutely wrong and hurtful. 

Put yourself in their shoes.  Let's say they have a terminally ill child.  This statement implies that God gave them exactly what they can handle.  Which leads to this kind of thinking:
  • God doesn't understand my limits or my suffering, because I am in WAY over my head. 
  • Okay, I am a strong person.  That's great.  My child is being punished because I am strong.
We started out trying to say something encouraging.  Instead we have isolated them, made them feel guilty, and possibly have pushed them even farther from God.

So, where did we get this catchy "sunshine and rainbows" saying? 

 I believe that people misunderstand or misrepresent 1 Corinthians 10:13.
 "No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.  But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it."   (NIV)
Scripture is not telling us that God will not give us trials beyond what we can bear, it is saying that God will not give us temptations beyond what we can bear. 

In closing, please choose your words carefully.  If you don't know what to say... say that!  You will do far less damage by telling the other person that you are at a loss for words.  (Believe it or not, they may not even be expecting you to say anything anyway.  They may just want to have someone listen to them!) 


Dear Lord, please help me to think about the impact of my words, before they leave my mouth.  Help me to comfort those who are struggling without hurting them in the process.  As Hawk Nelson sings in their song, Words,  "Let my words be life, Let my words be truth, I don't wanna say a word, Unless it points the world back to You."   Amen.




Friday, April 12, 2013

A legacy of lies...

"Telling a half truth is the same as telling a whole lie."

How many times have we heard our parents say this?  I don't know about you, but I heard this more than enough times.  Yet, how many half truths do we tell...?

Maybe you don't struggle with half truths or whole lies.  Perhaps you always tell the pure, unadulterated truth, never embellishing anything.  If that is you, great!  Wonderful.  You can stop reading now, because this post is not for you.

As we studied (in Moms' Bible Study) Abraham and Sarah, and then later Isaac and Rebekah, I was struck with a scary realization.  I lie.  A lot.  Way more than any God fearing Christian should.  I don't mean that I have grand webs of lies, or that I tell tales with the intention of hurting people.

Nope, my lies are of the more "innocent" variety.  You know, pretending your are not home when someone calls.  Using a little fib to get out of doing something you don't want to do.  Even glassing over a few parts of a story that don't make me look great.

I don't even call them lies... did you see that?  I pretend, I fib, I glass over things.  I don't lie.  Yeah, right.  

The scary thing is that I am a mom.  I have a beautiful little 2 year old who is watching everything I do and everything I say.  She is in full blown parrot mode.

What am I teaching her?  I tell her that lying is bad, lying hurts.  I tell her that lying only leads to further consequences.  But like any child, she is paying WAY more attention to my actions.

This brings me back to the Bible.  Twice in the story of Abraham and Sarah, Genesis 12:10-13 and Genesis 20:1-2, the couple lie.  They lie to the king and the pharaoh about their relationship.  
Genesis 12:10-13:  Now there was a famine in the land, and Abram went down to Egypt to live there for a while because the famine was severe.  As he was about to enter Egypt, he said to his wife Sarai, “I know what a beautiful woman you are.  When the Egyptians see you, they will say, ‘This is his wife.’ Then they will kill me but will let you live.  Say you are my sister, so that I will be treated well for your sake and my life will be spared because of you.”
 Genesis 20:1-2:  Now Abraham moved on from there into the region of the Negev and lived between Kadesh and Shur. For a while he stayed in Gerar, and there Abraham said of his wife Sarah, “She is my sister.” 
When we read this scripture it is easy to see why they would have lied.  If they told the truth, that they were husband and wife, Abraham may have been killed so the ruler of the area could take possession of his beautiful Sarah. 

They lied to save Abraham.  Well, kind of lied.  They half truthed... since they were half siblings.  (Gen 20:11-13)  Either way, Abraham and Sarah agreed to deceive people, instead of having faith that God would protect them.

Later we find their son Isaac doing the exact same thing with his wife Rebekah.
Genesis 26:7-9:  When the men of that place asked him about his wife, he said, “She is my sister,” because he was afraid to say, “She is my wife.” He thought, “The men of this place might kill me on account of Rebekah, because she is beautiful.”  When Isaac had been there a long time, Abimelek king of the Philistines looked down from a window and saw Isaac caressing his wife Rebekah.  So Abimelek summoned Isaac and said, “She is really your wife! Why did you say, ‘She is my sister’?”  Isaac answered him, “Because I thought I might lose my life on account of her.”
Isaac's parents taught him that it was okay to lie.  Abraham and Sarah used a half truth to protect Abraham, and Isaac and Rebekah used a whole lie to protect Isaac.  Both couples choosing deception over faith.

The legacy of lies continues on and on and on through out scripture, and in our families.

We can tell our children to, "do as I say, not as I do," until we are blue in the face, but we all know how that turns out.  Our children grow and reproduce our bad behaviors.

So, parents and grandparents, what kind of legacy do we want to leave for our kiddos?   Surely not a legacy of lies...


Lord, please help me to hold my tongue when I am tempted to lie.  Help me to be truthful and to teach my child that telling the truth is always the best option.  Guide me in raising my little one, leaving behind a legacy of hope, and truth, and love.  Amen.


Monday, April 1, 2013

Eve - "The Crown of Creation"

Speaking as a woman, I sometimes feel very insignificant.  Okay, I feel this way more often than I probably should.

I mean, you read the Bible and it seems like men are doing all these awesome things!  Noah built an ark, Abraham was the father of nations, Daniel survived a night holed up with some ravenous lions, Elijah called down fire from God onto a waterlogged altar, David not only whooped up on Goliath, but also became King, and, of course, we can't forget Moses and his amazing water parting skills!  Geez!  That is just the tip of the iceberg of the men found in the OLD testament. 

Now, I am not stupid.  I know that all of these men were born by women, and many of the men in Bible had the support of some lovely ladies.  But, we don't often hear about them.

Honestly, in my pre-Christian days I knew of two biblical women.  That's right two.  Eve and Mary.  The biggest screw up ever, and the mother of Jesus.  At least that is how I saw it up until few years ago.

The Bible was not a place for women.  There were not any realistic role models.  I mean, who wants to look up to a women who caused the Fall of Man, and who can compare with the mother of Jesus?


Boy, was I wrong!

Last month our Moms' Bible Study group started taking a look at women and their importance in the Bible.  Wow!  I have learned A LOT!  My hope is to share some of the important things I have learned with whoever wants to read them.  Enjoy!

The first lady worthy of honor is Eve.  

As I said before, my knowledge of Eve was limited to her role in the Fall of Man.  However, my take on Eve, and women as a whole has greatly changed.

Without going into too much detail, there are two versions of the creation story found in the Bible.

The first is found in Genesis 1-2:4a.  This version is believed to be written more recently (about 500BC).  The second version of the story of creation is found in Genesis 2:4-25, and was written around 1000BC.  If you want to read more on why there are two creation accounts, and why they differ, please check out this site:  Priestly Vs. Yahwist

For the sake of this post, I am going to use the Creation Story found in Genesis 2:4-25

To paraphrase the scripture:  God created the earth.  God created man. God created a garden, plopped man in the middle, and created trees and plants.  God commanded man to take care of the garden.  God told man not to eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.  God decided man needed a helper.  God created animals.  Adam names animals.  Nothing suitable for Adam is found.  God causes Adam to go to sleep.  God removes Adam's rib and creates woman.  Adam names God's new creation woman.  
*Whew! Take a deep breath!*

Now, there is something more to this story.  Something I missed for years.  Let's look at it again...

God creates the earth; this beautiful, wonderful planet.  God creates man, in his image (Gen 1:26); a creature designed to care for and rule over the earth.  God creates plants and animals; all serving a special purpose and crafted with special beauty.  Yet, something is missing, or shall we say someone.

God creates, and creates, and creates.  He fills the world with wonder, purpose, and magnificence.  But something isn't quite right, not yet.

God had not yet created Eve.  Eve was not an afterthought.  She was not simply another creation in a long line of creations.

She was God's final brush stroke.  She finished creation.  There was something missing, Adam desperately needed a partner, a helper, a companion.  He needed someone who completes him, who could journey with him.  He needed a counterpart.

As John and Stasi Eldredge state in their book, Captivating,
"Given the way creation unfolds, how it builds to ever higher and higher works of art, can there be any doubt that Eve is the crown of creation?  Not an afterthought.  Not a nice addition like an ornament on a tree.  She is God's final touch, his pièce de résistance.  She fills a place in the world that nothing and no one else can fill.  Step to a window, ladies, if you can.  Better still, find someplace with a view.  Look out across the earth and say to yourselves, 'The whole, vast world is incomplete without me.  Creation reached its zenith in me.'"
 So, ladies, while we may sometimes feel insignificant, we are anything but insignificant to the One who created us.  Slap a big smile on your face and remember that creation is not complete without you!



Dear Lord, please help women to see their place and their value in Your kingdom.  Guide us in teaching our daughters to be beautiful and confident in faith and love.  Amen.


Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Imaginary Jesus... Will the real Jesus please stand up?

 Okay, so Imaginary Jesus is actually the title of a very interesting book by Matt Mikalatos. 

While this is a ridiculously good book, and I think you should read it, I am not writing this with the purpose of selling the book.

Imaginary Jesus REALLY made me think. 

Looking back over my life as a Christian, I realize that I have most definitely been following imaginary, made-up, Jesuses(?).

When I was new to the faith Magic 8 Ball Jesus was my bud.  He was so convenient.  Our typical conversation would go something like this:

Me: "Jesus, am I going to make it to the gas station before I run out of gas?"
Jesus: "Outlook good!"

*Thankfully* my fondness for Magic 8 Ball Jesus dissipated when I started to ask questions with a little more content.

So, I moved on to other imaginary Jesuses.  I went through
  • Children's book Jesus
  • King James Jesus, because as we all know, Jesus spoke in 1600's English... 
  • Patriotic Jesus
  • Legalistic Jesus
The list could go on and on.  

Mikalatos states in his book,
"The real Jesus was frightening sometimes, and he said things I didn't like.  He required sacrifice.  He scared me by doing things I didn't believe he could.  He was a better person than me. 
I preferred my fake Jesus."
As I look back over my years as a Christian, I had no idea that I was following imaginary Jesuses.  It is painfully clear that I was.  Painfully clear that fake Jesus, whatever form he might be in, simply tastes better.  I preferred fake Jesus. 

Which really makes me think,
"Am I still following an imaginary Jesus?"
I believe the only way that we know if we are following the true Son of God, is if we compare our Jesus with the Jesus in the Bible.  If they don't match up, we have an imposter. 

I find myself more and more delving into God's word.  The real Jesus is in there.  He may not be the easy Jesus, or the least controversial Jesus.  He may ask me to do some pretty crazy things, put me in some uncomfortable places, and scare the daylights out of me, but this is the Jesus I was made to follow.

This is the Jesus I want to teach my daughter to follow. 


Lord, please reveal yourself to me.  I want to learn to know the real Jesus.  I want to follow the real Jesus.  I want to be a genuine Christ follower.  Give me the strength to leap into the faith and love that you designed for me.  Amen.




Mikalatos, Matt. Imaginary Jesus. Tyndale House Publishers Inc. 2010.

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

"I give God 10%, why do you get 18?"

First, I have to start off by saying that giving a tithe to God, and giving a waitress a tip are TOTALLY different things. 

Restaurant ReceiptSeveral places in scripture we are told to tithe, to give back to God 10% of what belongs to him anyway.  Tithing is an act of worship.  It is a declaration of faith.  When we tithe we humble ourselves before God, with a meager gift, having faith that God will use it to bless us and others in more ways then we can imagine.

So, why then do we tip?

Surely not the same reasons for tithing! When we tip those who serve us, we are expressing our gratitude.  We are showing them that we care about them and their well being.

As many people know, in the United States, restaurant servers are not paid a fair wage.  The majority of their pay comes from the graciousness of those they serve.  In the state of Pennsylvania, the current minimum wage for servers is a mere $2.83.  That is less than 40% of the standard minimum wage!  Once you factor in all the bills that go along with living, like: health insurance, rent, the cost of a vehicle, food, utilities, and cell phones, our servers are far from wealthy. 

When we as Christians sit down at a restaurant table, bow our heads, and thank God for His grace and love, we need to make certain that we acting as God's mirrors; that we are reflecting those same things to our servers.

Justin Lee, in his book, "TORN: Rescuing the Gospel from the Gays-vs.-Christians Debate" he says,

"Sundays are the worst," one of the servers explained to me. "That's when the church crowd goes out to eat."
"What's wrong with the church crowd?" I asked.
"Oh, honey," she said. "They're usually the most demanding, and they're always the worst tippers. I guarantee you, if you see your table praying before the meal, you can mentally subtract a third from your tip."

There have also been plenty of stories circulating about people who believe that leaving gospel tracts instead of money is an acceptable alternative.  I personally believe that these people fall into the category of "Too Heavenly minded to be any earthly good."  Yes, I understand that spreading the word of God is really the best "tip" that you can receive.  However, failure to take care of a person's earthly needs shows a lack of love, is that the Jesus that we are trying to show them?

I think there should be a shift in Christian attitudes.  We should be looking at a failure to tip, as a failure to provide for God's children.  

As it says in James 2:14-17:
What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food.  If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it?  In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.
So, fellow Christians, let our deeds be examples of faith.  Don't just tip your servers, tip them well.  Be kind, patient, and understanding.  Show them the love (and forgiveness) that Christ has shown you. 


Lord, again we pray, please help us to see that what we have is yours.  Yours to use for your people. Help us to be more giving to others, and help us to better understand their plight.  I pray that we take advantage of any opportunity to show Christ's love through our deeds.  Let us be your mirrors, reflecting grace and love into the world. Amen.


If you would like some background on the story behind the receipt, please visit: